My Theory

"Forget what you heard, recognize what you see. I know you heard the here's the real me." XoXo

Friday, February 26, 2010

Music Review; Nikki Minaj

Female rappers have always been few and far between. My generation had Lil Kim and Foxy Brown and the generation before me had MC Lyte, Salt n Pepa, and Queen Latifah and it seem that this generation has Nikki Minaj. The transition the has occurred between the styles in female rappers is tremendous. The clothing style has changed, the rapping style has changed and a new era of 'sex appeal' was brought about when Lil Kim came on the scene.

Nevertheless, Nikki Minaj has made me scratch my head several times. She is aiming for the sex appeal that Lil Kim had but her rapping technique is like none I have ever seen before. Foxy Brown and Lil Kim were mediocre rappers morso known for their sexual lyrics and image. Yet, in the past 2 weeks I have heard Nikki on at least 7 different tracks. Some tracks have that barbie doll touch, some have that tough raspy touch and others have a west coast kind of touch.

Until recently I have never really formed an opinion about Nikki Minaj because I never really thought she was opinion worthy; however, I might have been wrong. Although she looks a hot mess (at least to me) she is the only female rapper in the game right now. She's on so many different tracks right now she's like the female version of Lil Wayne...ok maybe not, but you get the point. I'm not going to address the whole "Barbie" image she is selling but lyrically I think we need to start giving lil Nikki Minaj some credit because she is definitely alot more versatile then the female rappers before her.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Love of your life or not so much???

For the past few weeks my best friend and I have been talking about relationships and marriage. It is always refreshing to hear things from a male prospective and I am constantly amazed at how different men and women think. Nonetheless, the point I wanted to address today is when it comes to love and matters of the heart how do you decide who to settle down with. Do you wait on the love of your life because you brought into the belief that you want to marry the guy who makes you weak in the knees and melts your heart, or do you marry and love the man who love you and is there when you need him?

This has been a question on my mind for quite some time. It seems as though the guys you are not interested in know how to treat you and what to do and the guys you like cause so much drama and take so much work, you wonder if its worth it? I am very curious to know how many people have married the love of their lives and how many people have married someone because it was time and the guy treated them well.

Its hit or miss, I say wait on the love of your life what are your thought?

Friday, February 19, 2010

Different World

For those of you who didn't know TV One has been airing daily episodes of "Different World" in lieu of Black History month. I loved loved loved Different World and it is a contributing factor in why I chose to go to a HBCU. Different World made getting an education look fun. Week after week I would watch Whitney and the girls, learn life long lessons about the importance of friendships, the pains of relationships and real life issues such as date rape and racism. Today's episode was when Whitney headed off the step team and boy did that take me back to my own stepping days ZPHI!!!! But I digress.

I couldn't fathom anyone not liking this show so if you get a chance definitely check it out. It airs on TV One at 12am ET.

BK Vixen Gone ??????

The past two weeks have been the longest weeks of my life. I welcome the month of March and all the drama free days in stored for me. Lately my mind has been consumed with 3 thoughts. 1) thoughts of my grandmother 2) where will I move to and 3) the "talk". You already know that I lost my grandmother last week and have been dealing with that. Since I am not ready to tell you guys ALL my business we will skip the "talk" and we can discuss the move. Although no decisions have been made I am so excited. It lifts my spirits to know that the baggage, drama and boredom of Md will soon be behind me. When I moved from NY to MD it was exciting because it was like starting all over. Well thank God for more than two chances because I will soon have that chance again.

I've been thinking about my blog and I wonder will it read: bkvixengoneNC or bkvixengoneatl or bkvixengonechitown? None of those names sound the least bit catchy but I guess time will tell. Right now my #1 choice would be Chicago, but the cost of living is so expensive there I do better just moving back to New York. Charlotte would be my next choice but I'm looking to be baggage free, I'm not sure if Charlotte to keep me honest to that. Atlanta would be last choice but maybe the best choice. My best friend lives there, my gym has a branch there and I already secured possible living arrangements.

No matter where I go I know this is the right decision and one that I look forward too. Whether its ATl, NC or Chi-town, all three of those are well to do cities so I can't go wrong. The research continues and as usual,I will definitely keep you guys posted.

Tiger Finally Speaks But Why??

"It's not what you achieve its what you overcome" these were the words spoken by Tiger Woods today in his first appearance since November. I wonder if that quote still applied when tiger was at the top of his game and the endorsements kept coming in. For 15 minutes Tiger stood rehashed the details of his affairs in a poised, calm manner. While he addressed many of the rumors such as the domestic abuse, the performance enhancers, his sex rehab therapy and many other issue, I heard no sincerity in words. Tiger stated he was going away and when he returned he would make his "behavior more respectful to the game" but it all just sounded so lame. The press praised him for apologizing and putting everything out on the table but maybe I was watching something different. The words were right but the body language and his tone looked empty. At one point he even looked straight at the camera and said "leave my wife and kids alone" and I almost practically laughed because he sounded like he was reading a script for a commercial.

Like any another man who gets caught in his mess Tiger has hit rock bottom and is now in full damage control mode. As I listened to the news say that Tiger's speech was "remarkable" I had to wonder. I mean any girl who has ever been cheated on before can tell you that, that speech reeked of rehearsal and not sincerity. Between him glancing back and forth at his notes and timing his eye contact with the camera perfectly it was a debacle. Call me old fashion but regardless of how much money or fame one has, when you speak from your heart cue cards and camera gazes become irrelevant. I would have liked to see Tiger address the audience and fess up to his mistakes without the cue cards and the rehearsals, just real talk.

Tiger is not the first man to cheat and unfortunately he won't be the last one, but given the magnitude in which he cheated (the prostitutes,the payoffs, and ALL of the mistresses) I think America deserved more., I think his wife deserved more. Fox news and channel 7 can say he was remarkable if they want, I say...he's only sorry because he got caught; now that's real talk!

Let me know your thoughts!!!!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

I Hate The Wendy Williams Show

The comment I am about to make might offend some of you but, its my blog I write what I want. I HATE the Wendy Williams show. I mean she has her moments when her celebrity guests are pretty good and her hot topics are slightly interesting but I personally think the show is a flop, reason being:

1. Wendy Williams is not fabulous enough to have her own show. Her wigs are drag like, her close up shots are frightening and her breast are just silly. I know I sound harsh but the truth is that she looks ridiculous to me and it is hard to take what she says serious with those F size breast. The are horrendous and scream for attention.

2. Another issue I have with the show is the hot topics. I did say they are slightly interesting but its never jaw dropping news. In other words maybe they should change the title to mild topics, because her hot topics are weak.

3. The final reason is that I am all for "sista power" but the whole sista girl talk show thing is getting a little old. We have boring Tyra, Fabulous Oprah, Ghetto as hell Monique and Ridiculous Wendy. Aside from Oprah these woman have the same exact show. How many times do I need to see the same interview with Kim and Chloe Kardashian? Its redundant and I'm so bored with it.

I loved Wendy Williams when she was on the radio because there was no visual and you sort of imagined her to be a sista who had herself together and was fly enough to be certified, to talk about people the way she does. She also sounded a little more real whereas now she sounds and acts like she's consumed 5 Red Bulls right before the show. It doesn't come off as enthusiastic and genuinely happy. To me it looks a little Hollywood and very fake.

All I can say is that I hope Oprah stays around a little bit longer because if you tallied up Tyra, Monique and Wendy, all three shows are ghetto as hell. Who pulls out a cheat sheet from their shoes or hair? I mean come on, do we really need to be ghetto just to be funny?

I will leave off by saying its cute when she shows the video clips of the little kids saying "how you doing" But seriously, lets get Wendy back on the radio and off of my tv screen!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Denial - Remix

Not much to say today except that I've been hearing Denial by Paula Campbell feat. Neyo on the radio alot. Definitely feeling this song. If you haven't heard it already check it out.

Hangover -My version

In a little over a month I will officially be celebrating my 25th birthday in VEGAS!!! Ok, so it might not be my 25th but still I am finally going to Vegas and I am ecstatic!!! I'm not certain what my obsession is with Vegas but I'm a firm believer that there are certain things a gal is suppose to do when she's young and single and Vegas is one on them. I'm sure Hangover is also partially responsible for why I'm so excited about Vegas because I think we all would agree Vegas looked fun as hell in that movie.

Aside from a little partying I plan to see a show, do a little shopping and maybe see what the gambling scene is like. I'm really not into gambling, but even if I just watching I can assure you I will have the time of my life.

Last year I treated myself to a trip to LA this year the treat will be to Vegas. Any recommendations on places I must see????

I will definitely keep you posted as the trip soon approaches. I can't wait to see what MY version of Hangover will be!!

Saturday, February 13, 2010

It's my life I move where I want!!!!

For the past few months I have sooo not been feeling Maryland. I have done an excellent job in making Maryland my home for the past few years but its about that time. Not only do I feel like I am going to suffocate here, I feel like some of the friendships I've had are sucking the life out of me. I have found a church, friends, a good job, a great gym and plenty of other wonderful things here, but its not enough. So instead of sitting in misery and complaining I am on the hunt. In the next 200 days I will find the perfect place to move to. In the upcoming days I will do a thorough research of cities I would be interested in. I will know the demographics, the cost of living, things to do and I will make my move:

The places I am currently considering thus far are:


If you have lived/live in a CITY that you think would be a great place to live please shed some insight.

I am so excited the count down starts.............NOW!!!!

My Last Words

On Thursday February 11, 2010, I lost a very special person, my Ninnie (grand mother). While it is not my intention to exploit her death, since I have recognized the death of celebrities such as Michael Jackson and Alexander McQueen how could I not say anything about my dear grandmother.

She was an amazing woman and I have the wonderful privilege of looking just like her. Not only was she the sweetest woman ever, she played an instrumental role in raising me, my siblings, my cousins and pretty much my entire family.

She always had a bottle of ice cold Pepsi in the fridge for us and she made fried chicken like no one else could ever hope to make. I remember going to her house on Fridays after school and we would sit and talk and watch Little House on The Prairie. She was the kind of grandmother who would crack you up with every story that she told and every now and again she would slip and use a odd form of profanity that just made you laugh hysterically.

Thanksgivings consisted of all our families coming together eating and having a grand ole time. Sing-a-longs around the piano and everyones' attempt to play the song from the movie BIG was a must. My grandmother would make the best pie and every family wanted to go home with one of there own pies and she always made enough.

Whether it was Thanksgiving or summertime or even after school, going to see my Ninne to just sit with her was always an amazing experience. I will never forget those moments and when I'm old and gray I pray to be as sweet and giving to my grand kids and family as she was to us.

Thank you for the many lessons in life you have taught me and the family moments that I have come to cherish so much. I love you always and will never forget you.

Friday, February 12, 2010

A Rose to Happiness

The other day
one of the worst snow storms ever.
After suffering from cabin fever for the past 2 days I decided to venture off to Starbucks. Conditions on the road would not allow me to drive so I headed out on foot. My friend and I met and after walking 15 blocks in the cold and snow we warmed our fingers and toes to tea and cider.

The subject of relationships came up and my friend began to tell me how woman always ask questions they already KNOW the answer to. I did my best in standing up for woman all over the world and I told him that men are so complicated, sometimes we never know what's going on with them. He strongly disagreed with me and began to tell me a story about 2 of his co-works, Carl and Tasha.

Carl and Tasha was dating and broke up because Tasha found Carl cheating. Carl begged Tasha for another chance and at first she wouldn't hear him, but eventually she softened up a little bit. Tasha told Carl exactly what she wanted him to do, to get her back and the list consisted of 1 small task....."buy me flowers she said." Carl, would whine about him not being a "flower kind of guy" yet he still wanted Tasha back. For the next few month Carl and Tasha would be on again off again, on again off again, and the flower issue would come up every time.

My friend used this story to make his point that even though Carl knew what to do and deliberately did not do it, Tasha would still allow herself to be confused by his actions and would always question why Carl would not get her flowers.

Listening to this story I realized I had no opinion. I didn't know what was going on with Carl. He would take Tasha to lunch, put in quality time to see her yet, his trifling ways would not allow him to do the smallest thing. If this was a issue that could be resolved in time, I don't know. If this was a indication that Carl was a dirt bag and not worth it...I don't know that either.

My friend and I concluded the conversation with him saying that deep down...Tasha already knows if the dude can't do the one thing she asked when she made it as simple as possible for him, she should know what that means. We left the conversation at that and we both moved on to another topic.

The irony in this story is that within 24 hours I received a text from this same friend saying "Guess what, Carl FINALLY brought Tasha some flowers today who knew?" I thought that was the sweetest valentines story I heard all week and although I don't know Tasha I am happy for her, because every girl deserves a rose. I hope my friend has come to the realization that sometime woman really don't we hope.

The moral of the story never know :-)

Happy Valentines Day everyone!!!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

The Cafeteria

We have all seen Carrie and the girls meet up at their regular spot for food, gossip and girl talk. Well guess who ate this well known restaurant the last time I went to New York? Yep, I went to the Cafeteria a few weeks ago and I was extremely impressed. I got there about 1:30 on a Sunday afternoon, and the place was packed with trendy well dressed beautiful people, all waiting patiently to eat at this delightful place.

After 30 minutes we were seated and greeted by a very pleasant waitress. I ordered the Silver dollar pancakes with fresh berries and Chantilly cream. I wasn't exactly sure what Chantilly cream was but it turned out to be delicious! I barely even needed syrup. My friend ordered the Hanger Steak and Eggs and we topped our meals off with fresh mimosas'. Mimosas' at 1 pm now that's definitely the way to do it in NY.

I was told to keep this place to myself but I just had to tell you guys that you absolutely must go there at least once. The menu has a wide variety of specialty meals, drinks and breakfast entrees all of good size proportion. So whether you grab a Mocktail with the Mac'n cheese Spring rolls or a Mocktail with one of the Blue plate specials, definitely check out the Cafeteria and see why Carrie and the girls made it their spot.