My Theory

"Forget what you heard, recognize what you see. I know you heard the here's the real me." XoXo

Friday, July 24, 2009

TEXTING does not equal Talking

Recently, I have heard alot of complaints about how technology is almost eliminating the need for communication. Text messaging, FBing, BBMing, IMing, Twitter, MySpace and email are the hiding places for those who opt not to participate in face to face interaction. On numerous occasions I have been guilty of texting instead of calling or emailing instead of talking, but after the text message I recieved the other day, even I can admit that the lines of communication between men and woman are really getting bad.

A few week ago I met a average looking man outside of a very popular DC lounge. Ten minutes after meeting him he sent me a text message that read "how do you spell your name?" I found that slighty odd since my first name only has four letters but I texted him the correct spelling of my first name and went about my business. A few days later he texted me again and it read "text me your email address so we can make plans." Now that text was more than slightly odd, it was stupid!

It seems as though people today, are hiding behind networking applications because they are either insincere or lack basic communication skills. The intimacy of phone calls is almost extinct. Nowadays everything is well thought out and then typed into an electronic device sent from one hand to another. What happened to the good ole days when a man would call a woman and say "are you free this friday evening?"

As technology continues to make things easier for us at every end, some things actually require a little bit of work. Men, if you are interested in a woman pick up the phone and call her sometimes. Let her hear the sincerity of your voice instead of making her decode the sincerity of your texts. If you cannot say what you write/text then you problably should not be saying it at all. If you lack the courage or initiative to pick up a phone and ask a woman out then you don't deserve a date.

Needless to say, I did not respond to the text, my lack of geniune interest mixed with his lack of communication skills reaks of future havoc. The point is that there is nothing wrong with IMing, FBing, Texting or emailing when it is done in moderation. Lets open our mouths and not force our fingers to do all the communicating.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Wish List

Lately I have been mentally shopping for a few different items that I would like to purchase before the fall. So far the list includes: a Mini Netbook, a new Blackberry, Grey Stilettos, and a new Hobo.

Of course these items will only be purchased per the approval of the budget, but due to the need versus the mere desire I believe they will be approved. If you are asking yourself why these items are a need I will tell you. The Mini Netbook is a guaranteed way to enable me to focus on my blog and write more frequently. The new Blackberry is needed because in the past week I have dropped my Blackberry 5 times, plus it is now eligible for an upgrade. The shoes are self explanatory just look at them. And last but not least, there is no point in having a Netbook and a Blackberry if I do not have a bag to carry these items in....thus the Hobo.

I will definitely keep you guys posted as I mark each item off the list. Remember, Nordy's is having their anniversary sale now through August 3rd, make sure you check it out you do not want to miss this.

Until then, Happy Shopping!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Facebook gone Wild!

I am still fairly new to the whole Facebook thing however, I am tickled everyday by someones status, comments, or profile picture. Ideally, FB was created for networking purposes and to maintain connection with past or current contacts; however, in the past few weeks I have seen an abundance of things on FB that has made me look and shake my head. I have:

-had people request me as a friend when I know they don't even like me, they just want to be nosy.
-received friend requests with not even a note included from people I have NEVER officially met.
-witnessed chicks stalking their past or current love interests and then threatening to put him on blast via FB.
-witnessed a man/woman scorned and venting to FB as therapy.
-witnessed people discussing their need for sex through status updates.
-witnessed people save others as a friend and then privately go to back and delete them because they did not want to be rude and decline the friend request.

When you start putting your business on Front street, and using the audience of FB to threaten those who have done you wrong, or fake like you REALLY have alot of friends, or try to seduce people with your half naked pics just so you can feel better about yourself,....then something is wrong. If you will regret what you wrote in a month or a week then think about it before you do it.

I personally am not on a quest to have the most FB friends. If I don't know you and you cannot introduce yourself before sending a friend request then don't bother. If I know you didn't like me and you just want to know my business then your request will be ignored, and if by any chance I have dated you in the past and you think we are going to rekindle something I can assure you we won't!

I might catch some slack for saying what I have said but if you feel some kind of way then your motives were suspect to begin with. If you could care less what I say then I appreciate you accepting this blog as an expression of MY own personal opinion.

Happy Facebooking!!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Playing Us Close

They say women love hard and are emotional creatures. They say that woman get attached and hate to let go. The irony in both statements is that while men might not allow themselves to get "caught up" unless they purposely send you off, they never want to see you go. They want to keep you around because they fear if you go that door is closed and they can't get you back. Its actually quite selfish when you think about it. Why try to to keep a woman close if you cannot offer her all that she needs? Why try to keep a woman close if your desire to keep her near is derived from mere greed and selfishness, Why try to keep a woman close when even you know she is better off without you then with you?

By "playing us close" does the man then change and rectify some of the woman previous gripes? Or, is it just a lame speech that will pretty much result in more of the same?

A man will not let go unless its a decision that he has come to on his own; however, while that man is contemplating what to do, its up to the woman to take action and decide what is best for her. During the era of strong black woman like Michelle Obama and Oprah Winfrey, "playing us close" in 09' is just not good enough anymore. Fellas, step up or move out the way.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Mr. Officer, Mr. Officer

My 4th of July was great, almost perfect. I went to a family cookout and saw cousins I have not seen in years. We ate, reminisced, socialized and just chilled. After eating more than I probably should have I went home and awaited the plans for the night. Around 9:30, I decided to head out and go visit my line sister who was only in town for the weekend. It was a 40 minute hike but hey Hyde is well worth it.

When I arrived I was welcomed by a huge family with food galore and jokes for days. For the next 2 hours I can honestly say all I did was eat and laugh and I mean tears in your eyes, your belly's hurting kind of laughing. Around 1am, I decided it was time for me to go home. As I drove home with a feeling of satisfaction reflecting on how fun my 4th was this year, just as I was about to say it was puuurrrfect "woop woop" the sirens went off and I realized I was being pulled over.

Initially, I was a little annoyed but I had my seat belt on, I wasn't speeding so I really was not worried about why I was being pulled over. Mr. Officer, informed me that he was pulling me over because my tints were a violation. Now in my head I said to myself "why does any of this matter if I wasn't speeding or running a red light or committing a major crime" but I digress.

Mr. Officer, proceeded to do the tint check which was followed by him requesting my license and registration so he could issue me a ticket. My mindset at the time was "Its 2am, give me the darn ticket and let me go home!" Twenty minutes later, I was livid. I have always wondered what takes them so long to write a ticket! I decided to update my FB status in a attempt to calm me down and here comes Mr. Officer knocking on my window. He went into this long soliloquy about the tickets he was giving me and the reasoning behind it. That's when I realized......he said "TICKETS". Mr. Officer, was kind enough to give me 3 tickets and 10 days to remove the tints from my windows. I could not believe it.

If you know me, you know by now we have a serious problem but what could I really say? That this was BS and ask him "WTF??" of course I couldn't say that so instead, I mentally checked out of the conversation. Mr. Officer, realized I wasn't listening, had me sign for the 3 tickets and 10 day deadline and proceeded to walk away. .

Mr. Officer, stopped and said "Can I ask why the attitude?" OMG, he really asked me that. That was like lighting a flame to a match. I immediately opened my mouth to respond and then I stopped. I took a deep breath and said the following: "No disrespect, but I think it is crazy that you are giving me 3 tickets. I just got off of 495 and there are people doing 95mph. There are people being robbed and murdered and little girls being rapped and instead of you fighting the real crimes you pull me over when I am not speeding, not driving drunk, I have my set belt on and all I am trying to do at 2:00am is go home. You pull harmless me over and slapped me with not 1, not 2 but 3 tickets! That is why the attitude." In that single moment one huge tear rolled down my face.

My speech left my mouth opened, even I couldn't believe it. Of course it was too late for Mr. Officer to do anything about the tickets he had already issued me, but I know he knew I had a valid point. Mr. Officer proceeded to tell me that he is a "traffic officer" and his job is to ensure traffic safety which is why he issued me the tickets. He then attempted to make it seem like he gave me a heads up on how to fight the tickets; but, the fact still remains that I have 10 days to remove my tints and it will probably require 1 full day off from work to resolve this silliness.

I am not sure why I let Mr. Officer know why I was mad, nor am I sure why he even asked. I didn't yell but lets just say he never had to say "I can't hear you ma'am". I don't suggest nor encourage anyone to do what I did, and I admit I am lucky it didn't turn out worse then it did. I will say this though, I know without a shadow of a doubt Mr. Officer will never forget how valid my argument was, I saw it in his face! Its kind of sad that in the 35 minutes in total I was detained, I wonder how many real crimes were going unnoticed.

Nonetheless, I will not let this kill my joy. If anyone knows how much it costs to remove tints please let me know. I do not know how I am going to break it to "Ally" as to why she is getting downgraded, (she looked so HOT too) but I must do what I must do.

What a crazy world!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

"Whaaw whaaw gimme your #!"

With all that is going on in the world I am really amazed at how immature some people can be. I was at the gym the other day trying to get my work out on and this guy walked over to the machine next to me and said hello. As he grinned from ear to ear he proceeded to ask me my name and where I was from. Not sure if I was really interested I responded politely and said to myself "hmm......he's kind of cute lets see if he has any game." He mentioned that he saw me at the gym before and I guess he saw me that day and just decided to go for it since the gym was pretty empty. Now, I am open to good conversation however, if you are going to come talk to me at least bring your A game or some kind of personality pleeaaassse!

The gentlemen proceeded to tell me his name and then immediately asked me if I was single. Taken aback that my dating status was only his 3rd question I subtly redirected a question back to him and asked him where he was from. We went back and forth in an awkward discussion that did not flow too smooth for the next 8 minutes. The guy followed me from machine to machine talking and asking questions as if it looked like I could lift weights and talk simultaneosly.

Sensing my frustration, Mr. No Game asked me if he asked for my number would I give it to him? I told the boy, I mean guy to give me his number and I would call him. His response was "when do you want me to give you my number?" I'm not trying to be stuck up but you have to be kidding me! What kind of question is that?. If a man is interested he should make it happen and that is that. Asking me when should he give me his number and if I am going to call can be a little annoying when someone is seriously trying to work out.

In frustration, I told the guy it was nice meeting him and he could give me the number the next time he saw me since I didn't have any pockets. Dismissing him was not my intention but hey, since he couldn't get his game together a woman had to do what she had to do.

I saw Mr. No Game at the gym 2 days later and he walked straight past me as if he didn't try to holla at me 2 days prior. Shaking my head I laughed and made an attempt to be the bigger person by saying hello, but Mr. No Game never made eye contact.

In a situation like this a man makes himself look very silly and very salty when he responds this way. I will never understand why guys approach woman without putting much thought into their approach,and then throw silent tantrums when they get rejected. What happened to the old adage " If you fail to plan, you plan to fail?".

What made this story even more humorous is that when I updated my FB status with a shorter version of this story, I insinuated that men are babies and I received several comments on Mr. No Games behavior. "Give him a break", "Cut him some slack" was just a few of the comments I received. My personal favorite was: "Yes we are! Whaaa whaaa give me ur #! :)"

Men, when you approach a woman please come with your A game. If you have no game then at least have personality. If you have no personality then....I'm sorry, but maybe you shouldn't bother,<......PERSONALITY REQUIRED!!!!!