My Theory

"Forget what you heard, recognize what you see. I know you heard the here's the real me." XoXo

Thursday, August 26, 2010

My Collabo- The Result of Too Much Radio

After listening to the radio for a few days I realized that I am a hot line fanatic. I love listening to a song and hearing something witty that makes me laugh and want to remember it. Ironically enough, today's music consists of nothing more than hot one liners and catchy beats. Rappers are rapping about what the singers are singing about and when you mix it together the story is simple, everyone thinks they're as good as it gets and rightfully so!

As a stickler for catchy one line phrases this is what happend when I took some of the hottest lines from rap and mixed it with some of the most emotionally felt lyrics of today's R&B. You will be suprised how many different artist lyrics I have included in this. Hope you enjoy!!!

"Everybody pay attention This right here is my pretty girl swag:
There goes my baby
You the total package plus you pay your taxes.
Don’t know who big Meech and Larry Hoover is but if you ask me I’m ready.
I’m not scared of lion tigers or bears but I’m scared of loving you
I done went through just about two packs of tissues baby and you’re looking at me like you ain’t the issue baby,
Should I grab his cell, call this chick up start some shhhh then hang up
Or I should I be a lady
Oohh maybe cuz I wanna have his babies nah forget that!!
You broke my heart so I broke your car
You caused me pain so I did the same
Even though what you did to me was much worse
I had to do something to make you hurt.
You was just messing with those girls you was gonna get right back??
Yeah right! If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it!!!!!
You told me to go to hell and now you’re just gonna stand there and watch me burn….well
that’s alright because I like the way it hurts, I’m not afraid and I love the way you lie
Too many times I’ve been wrong I guess being right takes too long.
Don’t you get it, I want things to go my way but as of late they been going sideways.
So you single for the night? Call you Larry Holmes?
You live a magnum lifestyle Mr. Bedrock?
Where they do that at? Roger that!
Nah forget that, and forget you cause I’m hotter than 100 degrees, pretty face, thin waist with the sick weave.
I’m Paula Patton, thick these legs just keep on going,
I look like yes she look like no! baby I’m a boss !!!
You can be chasing while your times being wasted cause they got nothing on me
Boy I’m so fancy!
I’m more than just a number I doubt you’ll find another,
You better find my love, you better find my heart
Cause I’m chuckin my deuces up! to something better
Better late than never
But never late is better
Be good or be good at it……whichever’s better!"

For those of you who really know music you can tell that I only had to add a few adjectives to get this to go together. Artists these days are saying much of the same thing, the only difference is how much wit they say it with.

What's YOUR favorite one liner?

Monday, August 23, 2010

How Naughty Are Your Nighties?

Are you a T-shirt and boxer kind of woman or a pretty nightgown kind of woman? Does your significant other glance over at you at nighttime and smile because even at the end of the day you still look amazing or does he secretly post questions on Facebook, about how to get you out of those ugly dingy T shirts you wear to bed?

Bedtime apparel requires effort despite its late night hour. Ladies what you wear to bed sets the tone for the night and indirectly develops a pattern for the nighttime routine you have with your mate or yourself. A recent survey showed 3 out of 5 woman do not invest in nightwear. Comfortable T-shirts and shorts was their preference.

With the number of options one can chose from when it comes to sleep wear it is baffling to hear that some woman still opt to wear raggedy T-shirts to bed. There's boy shorts and matching tanks, boxers and matching tanks, baby dolls nightgowns, lace nightgowns, satin pajama sets, exotic lingerie and even sexy looking cotton night gowns to choose from. These options are not staple items you wear on special occasions. These options are things you wear on a everyday basis to ensure you look good not only for your mate but for yourself. The best way to think about it is, if an emergency forced you to leave your house in the middle of the night would you really want to go out in public in your dingy over sized T-shirt with the hole under the arm?

While some of you may think this is meaningless banter I assure you it is not. A good friend of mine recently posted on his Facebook page that he wants his girlfriend to burn all her dingy T-shirt and grandma draws and get with the program because he was becoming more and more turned off by her. His Facebook status received 37 comments from men and woman giving him advice on how to get his girlfriend out of her hideous T-shirts. While its sad that he needed to result to such measures as posting his nighttime problems on Facebook, it shows the brother must really hate these T-shirts if he is putting his own business on blast.

If woman make it their business to remember just how visual men are small things like looking nice for bed and keeping yourself up will eliminate alot of negative energy in your relationship. Ladies in no way am I suggesting that you wear La Perla every night. The point is not to look good for someone else the point is to look good for you. Don't cheat yourself with ugly moments due to laziness. Looking good means feeling good and if you all you have are dingy T shirts find a cute baby T and wear it with nice underwear and watch how much more attractive you feel even if no one is looking.

Here are a few comfortable sleep options which says cute yet still sexy.

Happy sleeping!!

Monday, August 16, 2010

A Walk To Remember

After an emotionally tumultuous week, I decided to take a few days off to regroup. During my time off I planned on trying some new things to spice things up. I did all sorts of crazy liberating things, some I will tell you in upcoming posts, others I will keep to myself simply's none of your business.

On my last day off I decided I would take a trip to Virginia and go to a park I have never been to before. I called it my little adventure for the day. I started my adventure with a calm mind ready to take on what I thought was just a simple walk in the park. I was fully prepared with my water, snacks, sunscreen, comfortable shoes, and camera in tote. After doing a little research I knew not to carry a purse and the only thing I might should keep an eye out for was snakes. Nonetheless, I was on my way in full nature girl mode feeling relaxed and fearless at the same time.

My adventure started out amazing. The first thing I saw was an amazing waterfall that took my breath away. I was so excited once I saw the waterfall I couldn't wait to see more. Immediately I took off with my map in one hand water in the other and I was off. As I walked and walked and I began to realize I was no longer on a path but more so a trail. There was not many people along the path aside from the two guys i passed dressed in hiking gear. I kicked myself for wearing my gladiators instead of sneakers but I was in such a good mood I kept on undiscouraged. What started off as a walk in the park quickly turned into a full hike; because, before I knew it i was climbing rocks and the only thing in eyes view was dirt, trees and rocks.

For a moment I felt magical, like I was in a Harry Potter movie or in Twilight. It was just me and the forest. While I could not see anyone I heard echos. The more I walked the more I realized if something happened to me, not a soul would know where I was. Matter of fact, I realized if I did not pay attention I might not even know how to find my way back. I began to drop my peanuts and leave a trail just in case. Proud of my quick thinking I kept on going. Sticky from the forest dew and sweltering sun my water came in quite handy that is, until I realized it wasn't enough. I would like to think I'm in pretty good shape but I was exhausted and I had only been hiking for about 30 minutes. I looked at my map to see what the next landmark was but according to my map there was none. No silly convenience stores, no snack stands nothing just me and the trees.

Part of me felt liberated by my adventure another part of me thought about what my mother would say if she knew I was out there alone. Feeling like the "stupid girl" in the movies who goes off in some deserted location all alone, I began to hear more echo's. From the sound of them I could tell those voices were miles away. It was at this point that I began to get a little nervous that I might not be able to find my way back, and that this adventure might be way too much for one city girl all by herself.

For those who know me you might be surprised I was even interested in this little adventure but what most people don't know is that I use to be a girl scout. Camping, hiking, horseback riding, mountain climbing, count me in. So after I give myself the "don't be afraid I'm from Brooklyn pep talk" I continued my hike. I ignored the feeling of fear that is trying to grip me. A fear so bad it was far worse than the fear I had when I pledged. But again I reminded myself how tough I was then and that I'm tougher now so I continued. Just as I started to breath normal and relax a bit I looked up and stopped dead in my tracks.

On this sweltering sunny August day I had just made eye contact with a deer who was standing less that 15ft from me. My first thought was to scream and take off and run. However, given the shoes I was wearing I decided that was not smartest idea. I tried to recall any stories that I heard about deers attacking people but none came to mind. So I looked that deer in the eye and slowly began to walk backwards. I'm not sure why I had my hands up as if the police was after me, I guess that was my of telling the deer "I don't want no trouble" I walked backwards until the deer was out of sight. He never moved, he just looked at me as if I was intruding upon his territory. I pulled out my map and on the back of it I looked at all the things it said be cautious for: snakes, drowning, no swimming, no boating, it said absolutely nothing about deers. I knew then it was time for me to go home. I was way out of my league and by now I had no more water left.

My walk had now turned into a mild jog. My fear had elevated to pure fright. "What the hell was I doing out here?" I kept asking myself "and what was that noise behind me I kept hearing?" I st oped to see if the deer had followed me and I was relieved that it did not. That is, until I hear the bushes rustling and saw something black coming out of them. I wanted to scream, to run, to hide but I couldn't move. All I could? think of was what black girl dies in the park on a Monday afternoon from being eaten by a bear My attention sprung back to the black creature emerging from the bushes. As it came out with great force I covered my mouth and jumped. It wasn't a deer, It wasn't a bear it was a horse! No rider, no saddle, just a horse who decided to cross my path. Frozen in my steps I stood there stricken with fear as the horse ran to meet my friend Mr. Deer. I didn't breathe, I didn't blink and as soon as that horse was was outta sight I hightailed my butt out of that park.

I ran like I was running the Olympics. As I made it back to the Welcome Center people looked at me as if they were confused. Drenched in sweat, grass and spider webs I looked like I lost my mind. I finally caught my breath and again I referred back to my map which read beware of snakes, drowning, no swimming, no boating. It said nothing about deers and nothing about wild horses. I no longer cared how crazy I looked or how many people stared at me, all I knew was this was way more of an adventure than this city girl bargained for.

An hour later I was back in my safe haven where there was no wildlife. I sipped on my Frappachino and reflected on my day. While my adventure did not go as planned I came back with a heck of a story. I wanted to spice things up and I did. You can take the girl out the city and the city out the girl, but don't you dare put that girl in the woods.

Stay tuned for some of my other adventures!!!!!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Daddy's Lil Girl Gone XXXWild!!!

How sad is it that Laurence Fishburne is forced to try to hold his head up high while his 19 year old daughtter Montana Fisburne makes her love for the XXX world public. Cheaply dressed in panties and barely there emsembles Montana told E! she knew she wanted to become a porn star at 16 right after she lost her virginity. She said that seeing herself nude in public "turns her on". When asked if she thought what she was doing was wrong, with abosolutely no conviction young Montana Fishburne said absolutely NOT! The XXX world is what she has always wanted to do and with or without daddy's approval she is going for it.

One can only wonder what would make what looks like a good well rounded kid choose such a dirty lifestyle. It wasn't a trouble childhood nor broken home as Montana admitted to having a very close relationship with both her mother and her father. The days of young girls looking up to idols such as Michelle Obama or Oprah Winfrey are gone, these days girls are looking up to Kim Kardashian as their role models. It is rumored that Montana thinks of Kim as her idol and after seeing her sex tape she immediately called the same producers and said she wanted to do a similiar tape.

The not so proud Laurence Fishburne has expectedly taken an angry oode of silence about all this. While Montana insisted that her interest for the XXX world is not intended to hurt her father she showed no sign of backing down.

I could only shake my head as I watched such a beautiful young girl head in the wrong direction. Watching the interview I thought of one thing which is, they say karma is a b#@ch and this is a perfect example of what I think is Lawrence Fishburne's karma coming back to him. Fella's karma is real and it might not come back on you directly but it does comes back. How a man can hold up his head when his 19 year old daughter tells the world she wants to be a porn star I don't know, but I think we all should say a prayer for young Montana and hope her goals in life take a more postive turn.


Today’s grip session consists of my random why’s and my “I Hates.”

What does Fantasia, Alicia Keys, and Gabrielle Union have in common? They are all home wreckers

Don’t you hate cowards? It’s just impossible to respect them.

Don’t you hate when people you use to date still call you well after you both realized there was NO connection?

Why are people really buying into Rick Ross’s new name Ricky Rose?

Don’t you just hate when you buy toilet paper and it’s way TOO hard but you brought like 12 rolls so now you have to suffer?

Don’t you hate when you go out to dinner with a guy and the waitress tends to all his needs without even looking your way to at least see if you want some water?

Why has Tiki Barber allowed himself to be another black cheating man statistic?
Don’t you hate when you bump into a EX and you are not at your best maybe even your worst?

Why do our celebrity black men have this new obsession with wife-in up strippers?

Don’t you hate when people use Facebook and Twitter to tell their ghetto business?

Men, why would you go to a females house and leave her toilet seat up? Thanks for the courtesy but we use it down thanks!

Don’t you hate when you sneeze and it feels like a fart wants to slip out? Don’t lie you know it happens.

Don’t you hate being the bigger person sometimes, when it’s so much easier to be the smaller person?

Why do radio stations play the same song at the exact same time?

Why do men at the gym think you want to be pick up if you have your head phones on and never look their way?

Why do people step on the brakes when they see a cop and their speeding? Don’t they know a radar detector picks up the break signal?

Why do woman over 30 still try to be “thick” don’t you realize your metabolism will slow down and the thicker you are at 30 means the fatter you will be 40?

Don’t you hate that the world’s idea of family now seems to be baby first then marriage?

Don’t you hate when you go to a friend’s function and the food is gross but out of respect you feel obligated to eat some and hide the rest?

Don’t we hate that although TI is only 5’4 he’s officially off the market now?

Don’t you hate when your friends continuously send blackberry blast messages or emails about events they KNOW you’re not coming to?

Don’t you hate that although you might not agree with all my hates and random why’s don’t you just hate that you read them all?? LOL

Feel free to join in an let me know what you hate or your random why's.

Monday, August 2, 2010

How Beautiful Are You Really?

If someone asked you to name a beautiful person who would your first choice be? Would you immediately think of Kim Kardashian, Jessica Biel or Beyonce? Or would you think of someone like Oprah, or the mother at your church who's kind to everyone and always giving of herself?

Today's society is obsessed with outward beauty. How superficial the world has become as we consume our thoughts with who has the biggest butt, the nicest legs. and the best swimsuit body. Yet, how often do we hear about who has the biggest heart? The people who go around doing good with good intentions and a sincere heart. These are the people who are not worrying about if their weaves are perfect or if their Louboutins are in season. These are the people who are good at heart and their goodness radiates true beauty.

So if I now asked how beautiful are you really what would your answer be? Are you the woman who is fabulous on the outside from head to toe but if you saw a pregnant lady struggling with a stroller, the thought to help her would not cross your mind? Or would you immediately run and help her because its the kind thing to do?
Are you the wife who has been married for 10years and has stopped putting in the effort to look good for your husband? Or are you the woman who still puts on a little lip gloss and perfume for your hubby because your agreed for better or for worse and he still deserves your best? Or finally, are you the woman who's not so attractive on the outside but whose heart is so giving and so kind that people see you inside out instead of outside in?

Beauty fades with age and at the end of the day your eyelashes, weaves and size 23 waist will not be what it use to be; so, do you continue to invest only on your outward appearance or do you plant good seeds to make your inward appearance as good as your outward appearance.

There are many people who are absolutely gorgeous on the outside and downright rotten on the inside. If I had to assess my own true beauty I would say: I am the woman who is fabulous on the outside and would help a struggling pregnant woman if I saw one. I would also have to admit that I am also the person who might fuss out my neighbor for blasting their music a 6:30 a.m, instead of using it as a reason to get up early and start my day. But I am a work in progress aren't we all.

Whether you are beautiful on the outside or beautiful on the insides know that beauty shines from within.. Make today the day you decide to truly be beautiful..I know I will!...

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Lyfe Jennings- Statistics

From a mans' own mouth, inspired by Steve Harvey's "Act Like A Lady. Think Like A Man" ladies find out how to find the remaining 10% of good men left according to Lyfe Jennings.

"25% of all men are unstable
25% of all men can't be faithful
30% of them don't mean what they say
and 10% of the remainin' 20 is gay

That leaves you a 10% chance of ever findin' your man
That means you better pay attention to these words that I say
I'm gonna teach you how expose the 90%
and show you what to do to keep the other 10.

Don't be a booty call,

If he don't respect you girl he gon' forget you girl,


If he's in a relationship

And he will cheat on her that means he will cheat on you.


Tell him that you're celibate

And if he wants some of your goodies he gon' have to work for it.


Be the person you wanna find

Don't be a nickel out here lookin' for a dime.


15% of all men got a complex
15% of all men dont practice safe sex
20% of them are from homes without a father
so there's a 50/50 chance that you'll marry a coward

Something to think about when you're takin' a shower

Something to swallow when you drank your bottled water

I'm gonna teach you how to expose the 90%

and show you what to do to keep the other 10



Don't be a booty call,

If he don't respect you girl he gon' forget you girl,


If he's in a relationship

And he will cheat on her that means he will cheat on you.


Tell him that you're celibate

And if he wants some of your goodies he gon' have to work for it.


Be the person you wanna find

Don't be a nickel out here lookin' for a dime.

Be patient! He's waiting!

You don't gotta settle for that

Leave all that stress alone!

Get you a backbone!

Stop being sorry for yourself!

Chances make champions

It's gonna take (patience)

Time is still (wastin')

Don't be a booty call

If he don't respect ya girl he gon forget ya girl


If he's in a relationship

If he will cheat on her that means he will cheat on you


Tell him that you're celibate

and if he wants some of your goodies he gon' have to work for it.


Be the person you wanna find

Don't be a nickel out here lookin' for a dime.


OCHOCINCO'S- The Ultimate Catch

I hate to admit that I have fallen for yet again another celebrity reality show but I have. The Ultimate Catch, is a new reality show which follows Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson, as he attempts to find the one. Think of the Bachelor meets Flavors of Love minus the ghettoness and you get the Ultimate Catch.

Week after week woman from all nationalities go to bat to win Chad's attention. The group of woman consists of the stereotypical ghetto black girl, the slutty white girl and the overly pretty Latina girl, amongst what appears to be a surprisingly good group of decent girls.

Maybe its my love for anything relating to football that draws my attention to the show or maybe its just refreshing to see a mans' point of view as he picks and chooses the woman he thinks can win his heart. Known for his outgoing personality and his ongoing role down to the final four on Dancing with the Stars, Chad Johnson is quite the entertainer. Rumored to have been involved with his DWTS partner Cheryl Burke, it will be interesting to see if this father of four is really looking to settle down. From 85 girls down to 16 the show has been surprisingly clean void of any of the tacky makeout sessions shown of Flavors of Love. Nonetheless, with 11 girls left it will be interesting to watch how things pan out. Keep an eye on the slutty Tara, and Chad's #1 Rubi, as something tells me those two will make it to the finals.

You can catch Ochocino's Ultimate Catch on Sundays, on VH1's.