My Mr. Big

I'm sure you are all familiar with SATC's Mr Big. He was Carrie's true love, the guy that sent her on a emotional rollercoater with his non-committal issues yet could never muster the nerve to make a clean break from her. Big ran havoc on Carrie's life, he even left her at the alter, but after everything was said and done, he finally overcame his commitment issues and married her. I'm sure at times we all shook our head at Carrie in disapproval wondering why she couldn't just let Big go and move on. The truth is, although they both had serious relationships with other people they always came back to each other. There was no such thing as a clean break with them.

I never shared this with anyone so Blogland feel special. I have my own Mr. Big and when I first saw SATC the movie it was like watching my personal life on the big screen. Watching my own mistakes, watching my heart go on an emotional roller coaster, watching my girls/family shake their head and tell me that the one dude I can't shake is a jerk.

To be honest it was so close to watching my life I was relieved when Carrie and Big finally got married. I was relieved that in the end it paid off and I used that as my hope that my situation will eventually pay off. I wonder if there ever is a happy ending or just more emotional roller coasters.

People always offer advice even when their opinion isn't requested, well this blog isn't seeking advice. I actually don't care what anyone thinks I should do. This blog is about my life, how I feel and what I'm going through. If any of you have been here before, then you know this is one of the worst feelings ever.

I've seen people marry their "safe choice" because they thought the safe person could make them happy. I've seen the look of "I settled" and all I know is that no matter how naive it may sound, I want to end up with the love of my life. The man who makes my heart skip a beat and treats me the way I deserve to be treated. Maybe I have already met this man maybe he's on his way, what I do know is Big or no Big, without risks there is no reward!!!